Here’s some of The Daily Show’s continuing coverage of the fake war on Christmas:

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Howard mentioned this morning that he was going to be appearing on O’Reilly’s show- he ended up ripping on him for the next ten minutes.

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Don’t forget for THE HOLIDAYS:

“The Red Rain Stops Here!” Umbrella thing is kind of funny- it shows just how poorly designed his product site is…

What a heartless bastard…

Here’s Keith Olbermann’s coverage of O’Reilly’s recent fatwa issued against San Francisco-

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My take on O’Reilly’s threat against San Francisco is that it started as another stupid comment among hundreds crapped out of this buffoon’s mouth every day… he got in trouble for it so now he’s attempting a weak swipe at Al Franken by claiming that his comments were satire.

It took him an entire weekend to come up with that argument.

Hilarious.

I heard O’Reilly say he was on a “satiric rift” today when he was trying to explain his comments about how al-Quaeda should destroy San Francisco- then when he came back from commercial he started saying “satiric riff” instead…. I wonder which one he meant?

Say what you want about Al Franken- at least the guy’s got better than a fourth-grader’s vocabulary.

Man, I wish those Andrea Mackris tapes went public- if only for the hilarity of hearing Bill O’Reilly talk about loofa-ing her bajina.

It’s been one year since Bill O’Reilly paid his one-time producer Andrea Mackris an undisclosed sum to stop talking about how much he wanted to fuck her sideways.

Happy anniversary Bill! Sad to think those tapes are probably sitting in Bill’s attic collecting dust…

Wow… great clip over at C&L.

Here’s a new feature on The Daily Show: “The Less You Know.”

Tonight’s topic– the recent torture picture coverup. Bill O’Reilly lays out his bullshit defense of torture to John McCain of all people.

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Howard caught a little of Bill O’Reilly’s show a little while back and noticed how much eye-liner the guy puts on..

Robin: “Who does he think he is, a member of Green Day?”

They go on to comment on how much he whores out his products on his show:

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Somehow Al Franken managed to catch Bill O’Reilly in a rare lie last night on his Sundance TV show- here’s the clip:

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In the last week or so we’ve witnessed some amazing moments of clarity coming from the right:

• The stem cell bill is flying through Congress despite enormous White House pressure - since Reagan died some Republicans are realizing science isn’t only there to disprove the existance of God; heck no! It can do so much more! In fact, scientific research might just be able to make the world a better place. How cool would that be?

  My only hope is that they renew that whole, “You’re not gonna see results for years, so why start research now?” meme.

• Voinovich warns against Bolton - He shouldn’t have let him out of comittee, Bolton is a disaster.
• Freedom Fries creator recants on Iraq war- he (finally) realized the administration was lying to him, and it turns out France was right. (France, of course, now lays in ruin thanks to O’Reilly’s scary boycott. Watch yer ass, Canada!)
• Everyone in the known universe rolls their eyes as Bush claims the 30% of people still stupid enough to support his “cut-benefits” plan for Social Security will rise up and oust those in Congress opposed to it.
• And of course Bush explaining his use of propaganda followed by thunderous applause.

How long will it take for a Republican congressman to realize that Bush won’t fund stem cell research with taxpayer money but doesn’t hesitate to fund an illegal war with it?

O’Reilly accused his guest, Austin defense attorney Courtney Anderson, of misleading the audience when she defended the Chronicle editorial. O’Reilly then read what he said was a quote from the editorial. Unfortunately, not one word of what O’Reilly read appeared in the Chronicle editorial or anywhere else in the paper. He and his staff apparently confused someone else’s commentary with the Chronicle’s.

Heh… dumbass.

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Media Matters cleans his clock again.

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Here’s the Jeff Gannon/White House Plant segment from last night’s Countdown with Keith Olbermann. I thought this was a pretty good look at the White House Planted Reporter story. Includes an interview with Post (and actual) reporter Dana Milbank.

I watched Countdown last night because I saw Olbermann had updated Monday’s O’Reilly football exaggeration story on his weblog and added some details- he didn’t really go into it on the show, but he put it all in this post.

Media Matters has the transcript from Keith Olbermann’s Countdown:

OLBERMANN: We segue now into our nightly roundup of celebrity and entertainment news, “Keeping Tabs.” And it turns out the 2005 Super Bowl was not entirely scandal-free. This year’s wasn’t about the commercials, the halftime show or even the Philadelphia Eagles’ pathetic clock management. It was about the Super Bowl program and Bill O’Reilly. The Fact or Fiction host and noted loofah user wrote the so-called end piece of the score card sold at yesterday’s little game. He waxed poetic about the inspiration that his own football career at Marist College in New York provided observing that he once punted a ball backwards. But that, quoting here, “I won the national punting title for my division as a senior.” O’Reilly concludes that “I guess you could say the end zone was the beginning of the no-spin zone.”

But Mr. O’Reilly has done a little spinning of his own here. Others might call it resume padding. The football office at Marist told me today that football was not a varsity sport there until 1978 — seven years after O’Reilly graduated. When he played, it was a so-called club sport where players paid all their own expenses, and schedules and, most importantly, statistical record keeping were haphazard.

So when he says he was the top punter in his division in the country in 1970, it does not mean what it sounds like. He was not in the NCAA Division I or II or the smaller-college NAIA Division I or Division II. O’Reilly in Marist played in something called the National Club Football Association. So writing in the Super Bowl program that you won the punting championship in your division would be like me writing in one of my articles in one of the World Series programs that I led the nation’s high school baseball players in on-base percentage in 1973.

I did, too. My on-base percentage that season was 1,000. I came to bat once and got hit in the backside with a pitch.

Yeah, I know, not really news… but this one seems particularly egregious.

From Media Matters:

On the “Talking Points Memo” segment of the January 25 edition of FOX News’ The O’Reilly Factor, O’Reilly declared: “[M]illions of Americans still can’t come to grips with the problem [of terrorism]. According to a new Pew Research Center survey, only 17 percent of Americans who voted for [Senator] John Kerry believe military force is the best way to defeat the terrorists.” In fact, according to the poll he cited, only 39 percent of all voters — including 17 percent of Kerry voters and 66 percent of those who voted for President Bush — agree with O’Reilly that “military force is the best way to defeat terrorism.” By contrast, 51 percent of Americans responding to the same question believe instead that “relying too much on military force creates hatred that leads to more terrorism.” In addition, 55 percent of all Americans agree “that good diplomacy, not military strength, is the best way to ensure peace.”

MMFA has the quotes:

“Hitler would be a card-carrying ACLU member. So would Stalin. Castro probably is. And so would Mao Zedong.”

I’m curious what, exactly, O’Reilly believes the ACLU does- he seems to be under the impression that they’re some sort of G.I. Joe style paramilitary organization.

And he complains that those damn librul groups are monitoring him… I think it’s pretty obvious why- he’s a fucking nut.

So anyways…. back to our regular bitching.

IFILM is hosting a reenactment of the Bill O’Reilly sex tape.

Warning: If you’re offended by cartoon nudity DO NOT CLICK THIS LINK!

There weren’t any. Just as we were told by the inspectors before invading.

Dear war hawks: Told you so.

You have a lot of apologizing to do- start with Hans Blix- he was reviled for telling the truth. I’m talking ceaseless personal attacks on his character- Limbaugh, Hannity, O’Reilly- you morons wouldn’t listen. When you were proven wrong you blamed the CIA. Fuck you. The CIA wasn’t there, the weapons inspectors were. Then Bush kicked them out.

We’ve since learned that the CIA was working against the inspectors- presumably at the instruction of the president. They were holding back suspicious sites that, if inspected, would have ruined Bush’s fake justification for war. (See “A Pretext for War” for more information.)

The UN inspectors told the truth, and they suffered for it. Now it’s your turn to suffer.

We can never, ever trust the criminals who got us into this again. Unfortunately we’re stuck with them for four more years- let’s give ‘em four years of hell.

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In the aftermath of September 11th there was a telethon which George Clooney participated in that raised $150 million dollars.

After the telethon, Bill O’Reilly repeatedly alleged fraud and that the telethon was resistant to an investigation, presumably to be conducted by O’Reilly’s falafel rubbing producers. The charges were false, of course, but many folks who promised money canceled their pledges because of O’Reilly’s invented controversy.

Now Clooney is participating in a new telethon to benefit tsunami victims- and O’Reilly is promising his viewers more fraud coming from those evil Hollywood liberals.

In response, Clooney has invited O’Reilly to appear on the telethon- He’s a better man than I.

If it were up to me I’d tell that miserable old doormat-hawking phone-sex-having vibrator-using windbag where he can put his loofah.

That guy will sell anything:

Just in time for the holiday that probably wouldn’t even exist without Bill O’Reilly defending it against those awful secularists!

Media Matters nails O’Reilly again- they are on fire.

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When Bill O’Reilly gets flustered, which appears to happen regularly on his (non-tape delayed) radio show, his language skills dip to dangerously low Bush-esque levels.

Remember when he challenged Al Franken to a duel?- he boasted that if these were the olden days out west he would have, “shot Franken between the head.”

Well put.

I love his response to a caller who urged O’Reilly to apologise for telling a Jewish caller that if he doesn’t like Christmas (or Christians attempting to convert him) he should go back to Israel:

“You should be ashamed of yourself. You’re not a good American. You’re a defamation person who is despicable. Have I made myself clear?”

Well, I think Bill O’Reilly is a defamation person. He’s also a lie person. And a screamer person… and a phone sex engager, felafel wielder, boob soaper, producer harassmenter person. Stupid person!

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I haven’t watched a lot of Bill O’Reilly lately since Media Matters has done a better job policing this jackass than I could ever hope to, but one thing I know from watching as much as I did is that Bill O’Reilly hates judges. When he disagrees with a judge, he all but demands his followers hunt them down.

It’s nice to see one of them fight back:

Rapkin, reached a few hours before the show at a private retirement party at a Main Street bar and restaurant, said O’Reilly has “got a lot of nerve” to attack him.

“Somebody who sexually harasses women and then pays millions of dollars in a settlement to get out of it has no place criticizing me,” said Rapkin.

Indeed.

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I make this charge based solely on observing the various O’Reilly photos featured on Fox News’s front page: